Sunday, 17 February 2013

Perfection Isn't There

If I go to your house I will undoubtedly see things that make no sense to me. Ornaments of a style or size or quantity I wouldn't have picked. Priorities that are yours and most assuredly, at this point, not mine.

Maybe I'll step into a home that appears spotless. One of those homes where you don't want to dirty the soap or ruffle the towel. Everything is in its place. Until you look in a basement room. Or open a back closet. On the other hand, maybe I will be justifiably impressed, but the truth is you knew I was coming, and so the army commands started in order to get all the troops involved in getting every last corner ship shape.

If you come to my house, you will undoubtably have some surprises. You will question things (so glad I no longer have to explain why there are miniature motorcycles, or crotch rockets, in my living room). I know it'll be far from ideal. Even the night I blogged about House Work or Sleep? after staying up until midnight cleaning, my husband was impressed enough to leave me a nice note, yet I still had a pile of clutter by the coffee maker. My mirrors remained dirty. My fridge was quite disgusting. I know I worked hard, but what would you think?

We all pass judgements. Whether we make choices based on them or not. You may wonder why someone doesn't put more time into their potential and appearance. Or why someone doesn't grasp that their attitude is trying to be around. Or why someone can be unreliable without any remorse.

But, what it all comes down to is, no one is perfect. We all have the things that pull us away from what we need to concentrate on. We all have distractions, emergencies, unexpected priorities. We can't do every single thing we want, strengthen all possible relationships in our life, be so well rounded that we are faultless in each area that matters to us. I have thought in the past that we could aim for this. That my home had to always be kept up while being a top notch wife and mother. It was a little too overwhelming and actually achieved the opposite. So glad I got over that before I discovered Pinterest.

Let's just say that perfection did exist. Who would be the judge of what that would be? Is it the thin woman with no fat or the curvy one with breasts and round hips? Is it the time efficient procedures or the quality product?

What works for one would not work for another. What would really help an individual would hinder another. What would encourage someone could distract someone else. Concentrating wholly on a particular task may seem admirable to one but a waste to another. We all have individual lives that have built up our personalities one slow step at a time from the moment we were born. How can you expect to undo the over 18 million minutes I have already experienced in my life so that I will exhaustively understand you? Then there are differences in the palates of all our senses. The world couldn't function if we all wanted to be race car drivers. And the world would be pretty boring if everyone's favorite color was red.

When I moved in with my family our house had an abundance of red. I found it quite overwhelming, but of course my husband appreciated the look and saw nothing wrong with it. He also favored brass. Me, not so much. Like every other pair of human beings, we differ in our ideas in many areas. To me, a perfect house would have no stains or dust or fingerprints (can we replace the heavily tracked marble floor in the bathroom?). To my husband, perfection would be every dish put away and the laundry baskets all empty. I don't even get to the bottom of the basket. Pretty much ever.

Our aim shouldn't be perfection. Our perfectionism may hinder the comfort of another and the resulting connection that could form. A perfection seeking parent would stifle the creativity, and in turn the emotions and concentration, of a growing child. A church aimed at perfection will only create judgement and fear instead of bringing people into a relationship with God. If I wanted perfection I wouldn't get around to posting my blog.

Preferably, aim for excellence. Doing the best we can do. Finding our strengths and living in them, taking advantage of them, flourishing in them. Finding our weaknesses and having patience with them, remaining honest with them, and being willing to work on them. Refusing to let our past be an excuse. Refusing to base our growth on others and what they accomplish or what they have.

When I go to your home I will appreciate your individuality. I will enjoy experiencing our contrasting idiosyncrasies. Because I am meant to be me. You are meant to be you. And no one is closer to perfection than the other because perfection doesn't exist.

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